Safer Sangha  » For Communities and Members

Feeling Safer in Meetings

What is meant by feeling “safe” in meetings? When we mention the word “safety,” it is referred to as psychological safety. Psychological safety is the trust an individual has for the environment, which allows them to express themselves and communicate freely without fearing negative consequences (e.g., criticism and rejections). Feeling psychologically safe is crucial for trauma and addiction recovery and the prevention of retraumatization. Past traumas are often present in those of us who are struggling with addiction, and it is a key ingredient to our recovery to be in meetings that make us feel psychologically safe, able to open up, and make meaningful connections.  

In sanghas, we can strive to foster “safer meetings” for members. We choose the words “safer meetings” to indicate that it is not possible to avoid all the emotional triggers of every member at all times. Despite our best intentions, there are also times when it is difficult to foresee what might make someone or even ourselves feel triggered. However, facilitators and members can work together to make the meetings safer than it was before. It is a process and not a destination. 

Connecting with Ourselves

We must first feel safe in our own body. Our relationship and connection with our body is significantly relevant to how comfortable we feel in an environment. When we do not feel safe, we can connect with our body to recognize the presence of a trigger and to self-regulate and reclaim a sense of safety within our own body. It is important to surround ourselves in a safe and protected space, but we often forget that within ourselves, our own breath, energy, mind, and body also need to feel like a safe and protected space. For those that have endured trauma or those who have been taught to reject their intuitions and feelings, this connection with the body and the ability to feel safe under one’s skin might have been lost. Reconnecting with our hearts through the body would then be a good first step. When you are in a calm state and at a comfortable place, you may ask yourself the following inquiries:

These are valuable wisdom from the body that you may use when you enter a meeting space to help you understand if this is an environment beneficial for your recovery that day. It is a way of recognizing and honoring our deepest intuitions. Following are further inquiries to explore when you are at a state of calmness and clarity:

• What does danger and threat feel like in my body? 
• What are some sensations and feelings under my skin when I am threatened or in danger?
• What does my body need in order to be soothed and nurtured?
• When my body feels threatened, what is the story that I am telling myself?
• What actions are needed for me to self-regulate, find support, or distance myself from threats?

When we connect with our body and understand how it sends us messages, it can swiftly inform us when we find ourselves in the midst of triggers and uncertainties, and it can help us understand the actions needed to re-establish safety. We can also build insight into our own pasts and old stories, understand our traumas and past wounds, and explore what are some triggers that drive you into fight, flight, or freeze. Choosing a meeting that avoids these triggers and attending meetings that would honor your presence and voices are wise actions, such as going to affinity meetings, meetings that accommodate your needs, or meetings with people who align with your energy and values. 

Below are a few resources for self-soothing, insight-building, and increasing your ability to cope:

Connecting with the Community

We must also recognize that the responsibility of fostering safer meetings does not solely fall on the individual, but the community as well. We do not exist in a vacuum, and part of cultivating safer sanghas means being aware of the larger societal structure and cultural context that helped shape the trauma, triggers, individual needs, and wounds of our members. Please see a list of training and resources you may use to build awareness in these areas and help foster individual growth as well as a safer environment within meetings. We also encourage meetings to adopt a trauma-informed lens and approach, including the understanding of discrimination-based traumas.

To heal ourselves is to heal the generations that have come before us 

and to create a ripple effect for the ones that will come after. 

Our collective healing is imperative in this lifetime. 

– Natalie Y. Gutiérrez

We can further foster safer sanghas through community agreements. Community agreements are agreements created by the group that delineate the consensus of individual needs, the ways to meet these needs, and how members envision to interact and exist with each other. 

We invite you to review the community agreements of your sangha and evaluate if you resonate with the visions of the sangha. If your sangha does not currently have community agreements, then it may be beneficial to discuss the need for creating one. Community agreements are important steps to take for a meeting to develop a deeper commitment to safer sanghas. To understand more about community agreements and how to create one, please read our article here.